TOP STORY: Bibleman invited to join Superfriends
METROPOLIS – Evangelical superhero Bibleman was recently invited to join the world’s most elite corps of do-gooders, the Superfriends. “We feel like he’s matured to the point of really making a contribution in our fight against crime,” said Aquaman, Bibleman’s main sponsor. Bibleman was added to the crew by a vote of 44-29, but only after a last-minute push by opponents who don’t want the group to expand. Wonder Woman and the famously ill-tempered Batman tried to cut a backroom deal that would have made Bibleman only an affiliate — equivalent to a deputized sheriff who could be called upon in dire emergencies. They swayed several stalwarts, including Green Lantern and Captain America, but personal lobbying by Superman, widely viewed as the group’s senior member, and key support from the Wonder Twins tipped the scales. More