There are certain sins that get a lot more attention than others. I find this advice by Martyn Lloyd-Jones very helpful as we think about how we react to those who come into church who have committed sins that may be a big deal to us. Lloyd-Jones is speaking to preachers, but I think there’s a wider application here.
Having spent the first part of my adult life as a physician in medicine, I have often been interested in the difference between the work of the physician and the work of the preacher … How does the physical deal with his patient? Well, the first thing he does is to ask the patient to give an account of his symptoms and his troubles — his aches and pains, where it is, how long he has had it, has it varied, etc. All this has to be gone into in great detail…
The preacher does not need to know these personal facts concerning his congregation … The preacher does not need to know these details. Why not? Because he knows that all the people before him are suffering from the same disease, which is sin — every one of them. The symptoms may vary tremendously from case to case, but the business of the preacher is not to medicate symptoms, but to treat the disease. The preacher therefore should not be over-interested in the particular form the sin takes. (Preaching and Preachers)
Simple point, but huge implications. Everyone we come into contact with is a sinner. The form that the sin takes isn’t the real issue. Focus in healing the disease (sin) rather than on the particular form that the sin takes.