Local phone service: You’d think I’d learn

Ever since we could choose a home phone service provider, I’ve found myself beguiled by cheaper deals. You name it, I’ve probably tried it. And I’ve suffered through:

• bundles that include high-speed DSL service that doesn’t work
• echoes on the phone line, like we’re talking through a tunnel
• misspellings of my last name (is Dash really that hard to spell?)
• almost losing the phone number we’ve had for 17 years
• misplaced orders (the orders that got lost only took 15 minutes to make)

This morning I talked to someone who asked at the end of the call, “Have I answered all of your questions?” He seemed surprised when I said no, but it’s true. And sadly it’s almost what I expect now.

You’ve heard the definition of insanity: trying the same thing and expecting different results. Therefore, I’m insane when it comes to local phone service.

I’m in the middle of a nightmare with one service provider now, and if it doesn’t work, I promise you I’ll go back to Bell regardless of the price. And if I ever change again, I give you written permission to shoot me*.

*Permission applies to watergun or taser only. Consult your lawyer for legal advice before proceeding.