Also not me

My namesakes keep getting me in trouble. This section from the book Comma Sense: A Fun-damental Guide to Punctuation is also not about me:

It’s reported that several guests at last Saturday night’s superposh “Romantic Semantic” soirée at the Hollywood home of Benjamin and Betty Brackets…complained of neck strain the next day, caused, we assume, by pretending not to be watching the passionate goings-on in the ivy- covered gazebo between Darryl Dash and Simone Semicolon (who, sources tell me, have just signed on to star together in the sure-to-be-smashing upcoming film, Grammarcy Park).

Scary. And also nothing to do with me. Teaches one not to do vanity searches.