Bene observed that this blog has changed, and that there’s less self-disclosure and openness here than there used to be. I think Bene’s right. As I think about it, here are some of the reasons why:
- 2006 was a horrible year, and it would have been inappropriate to process a lot of what happened online. That year is over now, and I’m thankful, but I think I pulled back a little in the process.
- Blogging can tend to be a form of thinking out loud, which leads to posts that haven’t completely been thought out. This is fine as long as everyone understands this, but it can also be dangerous. There’s a tension here. There’s a beauty that can only be found in early and rough drafts, but on the other hand – does the world need more half-baked ideas, especially from me? (Rhetorical question – no need to answer!)
- It can be fun to get a debate going, but I quickly tire of polemics. Blogging is a great way to exchange ideas, but it’s not always as great in sorting through issues. I’m a little more careful in picking my fights than I used to be.
- Finally, I’m not as despondent about traditional churches as I used to be. I am still a fan of newer, mission-shaped churches, but I’m also discovering some that look more traditional that are still on mission and wrestling with some of the important issues. It was easy to rant, but I have less reason to rant now, and maybe more reasons to learn.
All of this may have combined to make this blog lose a bit of its edge. This may be a bad thing in some ways, but maybe it’s good too.
I remember a couple of friends observing the difference between the online me and the real-life me. I don’t want that division to exist. The podcast on blogging I mentioned a couple of days ago touched on this issue, and referred to proverbs like this: “When words abound, transgression is inevitable, but the one who restrains his words is wise” (Proverbs 10:19).
I miss some of the early days, but there’s no going back – but maybe it will evolve (with a little more self-disclosure) into something better.