Hints for attending a Baptist Church without getting embarrassed:
– Go for the back seats.
– Never stage dive – there is no body sitting in the front 2 rows to catch you. (more following . . . )
– Don’t raise your hands, or you might be volunteering for something
– Don’t drink the coffee, it comes from a large steel device from the early 20th Century called an “Urn” Go for the tea instead.