Darryl's Blog
Slow death or deep change
It was sometime last year when I started reading Patrick Quinn's book Deep Change. Quinn essentially teaches that every person and organization is either in the process of a slow and sometimes painful death, or else, at every moment, undergoing a transformation at the deepest levels.
Quinn argues, "Anyone can become a leader of change, but to do so requires the transformation of self." At the heart of deep change is what Quinn calls the fundamental state of leadership. In this state, we let go of control, and become purpose-centered, internally directed, other-focused, and externally open. More on the book here and here.
As far as I know, Quinn doesn't write from a faith perspective, but I think he's stumbled on a little bit of theology in what he says. The Bible has a bit to say about inner transformation, changing from the inside out, and following God into uncertainty.
I remember reading the book last year and wanting the deep change process. I feel like it's happening right now. It sure feels like what he says: "traveling naked into the land of uncertainty." I talked about this a little bit the other day. It's a bewildering and somewhat exciting and scary thing.
It's not just happening to me either. I'm seeing others participate in this process. And some even ask if God is reshuffling the decks. Hope so. Hope we're able to keep in step with what he's doing.
larry crabb used to say something like (I think I'm remembering this right) that at any moment we are either moving toward heaven or moving toward hell. i don't think he was exactly making a soteriological statement. I think there's something to it. One might also say at any moment we are moving out of love or fear.
He's pretty much hit it on the head.
A few months ago, God made something very clear to me. Nothing of any real significance will ever take place in ministry as long as you (that would be me) are taking center stage. That until I was willing to make some specific internal and practical changes to hand over complete control to Him, not to bother to expect God results. By God results I mean a clear sense and awareness of His moving. Rather than being at that place where it's hard to tell the difference whether what's happening is due to God moving or just your own efforts.
The last few months have meant not lots but a few key internal and external changes. None of it much fun or what I would have chosen myself. But what I've been witnessing over the last few weeks has been awesome. Truth is, I was expecting a long dry period of testing, and maybe that is coming, but right now he's doing some really cool stuff. Certainly enough to want to make me want to stay...broken.
I've really appreciated your honesty, vulnerability and transparency in these posts. Thank you for sharing that.