Blue
Some things never change. In yet another Myers-Briggs like analysis my color is: 
What Color is Your Brain?
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May 31, 2004
May 12, 2004
Avoiding Pride
Caught! A few weeks ago I was a bit annoyed with a friend of mine, the reasons for which are of no consequence. Well wouldn't you know it - tonight, I did something completely similar in nature and didn't even recognize it until a very good friend hit me in the face with it! Ouch!
Excellent reading from The Imitation of Christ once again at Ourdailyblog.com:
Do not think yourself better than others lest, perhaps, you be accounted worse before God Who knows what is in man. Do not take pride in your good deeds, for God's judgments differ from those of men and what pleases them often displeases Him. If there is good in you, see more good in others, so that you may remain humble. It does no harm to esteem yourself less than anyone else, but it is very harmful to think yourself better than even one. The humble live in continuous peace
Yep, humble pie tonight.
May 10, 2004
Damaged Liar
I spoke with a widow this weekend who I have not seen for quite some time. She asked after my parents and I mentioned that Dad had had a fall and was now in a wheelchair. She offered her regrets and I responded that we were thankful to the Lord for the life he continues to have, painful though it is. Even before the words were complete, searing pain altered her expression. Although some years have passed since her loss, her eyes yielded up a pain that was biting and raw.
I left our time together regretting the encounter - regretting the pain I had ripped wide open - regretting my honesty about dad.
Last night, returning from Mom & Dad's, I cried yet again for my parents. The pain doesn't stop simply because the circumstance continues.
As I reflect back now on the two events I recognize that my words to the widow were mostly a lie. Mostly, I am not thankful to God for the life that Dad continues to have. It is agonizing for me to see my parents deal with all of the implications. It was not my honesty that hurt the widow but my lack of it.
The following from Henri Nouwen's Literary Centre brings a much needed healing oil to my soul today.
Holding the Cup
We all must hold the cups of our lives. As we grow older and become more fully aware of the many sorrows of life - personal failures, family conflicts, disappointments in work and social life, and the many pains surrounding us on the national and international scene - everything within and around us conspires to make us ignore, avoid, suppress, or simply deny these sorrows. "Look at the sunny side of life and make the best of it," we say to ourselves and hear others say to us. But when we want to drink the cups of our lives, we need first to hold them, to fully acknowledge what we are living, trusting that by not avoiding but befriending our sorrows we will discover the true joy we are looking for right in the midst of our sorrows.
Still working through my grief: recovering damaged liar.
Mother's Day
Sometimes special days go a little awry - expectations don't match up with the reality that gets delivered. Sometimes... but not this Mother's Day.
Tina made paper flowers and a card for me which I received on Friday. Saturday evening she went with me to Ali's concert. We didn't plan to go together as a Mother's Day thing but sitting beside her certainly was a wonderful way to celebrate the joy of being her mother. On Sunday morning I received a card from Darryl and another from the kids together with a hanging flower basket. Darryl left early with the kids for church and I got some "quiet time". During churchtime Tina made wonderful sugar cookies topped with icing and sprinkles! Yummy (Very little sharing on my part!!) Josiah coloured me a picture and we have a kit to make a "handprint". Following church we went to Mom & Dad's where Darryl served up dinner that he had made for all 8 of us. Josiah completed the celebrations on Sunday afternoon with repeated times of body-slamming, bear hugs, kisses and "I love you Mommy". The bruises provide ongoing reminders of his full-contact affection!
Another great memory moment.
I'm blessed.
A special thank-you to all who made my day so special: Darryl, Christina, Josiah, Jon, Natalie, and RBC teachers: Linda, John & Joy for their extra efforts
May 8, 2004
Ali Matthews CD Release
Going to Ali's CD release party tonight! I'm very excited to be able to share in the celebration of yet another milestone for my awesomely talented highschool friend!!
May 5, 2004
Saving Grace
Lately I've had some thoughts rolling around in my mind on a number of different issues: blog comments, family decisions, ministry stuff. The words of John 12:46-47 by way of Sacred Gateway came alive inside of me with incredible joy as I spoke them aloud:
Jesus said to the crowds, "I have come as light into the world, so that everyone who believes in me should not remain in the darkness. I do not judge anyone who hears my words and does not keep them, for I came not to judge the world, but to save the world."
Free! Free to love the sinner and the saint in the midst of their sins! Free to love the disobedient. Free to entrust others to the saving, redeeming work of Christ.
Where can I see this kind of light in action? How many of us really treat others this way? How often do I judge the responses of others? Do I really not care if someone hears my pathetic attempts at words of truth and they do not keep them? Do I allow God to handle someone else's sin in His own way and time? Where do we get off-track?
Christ holds the power to save us. Grace allows that saving to happen in the strangest of ways. Now that's something to celebrate!