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My "first" opportunity to speak, to be a voice, was a most humbling moment. The word impressed upon my mind by the Holy Spirit was "surrender". Like Moses I felt challenged to trust that, in the required moment, the Lord would provide the words that He desired. Throughout the day Saturday I occaisionally would think of thoughts for prayer but repeatedly the spirit would remind me to wait upon the Lord. When the moment did arrive I realized fully why the Lord directed me in this way. Surrender, full surrender, was not a message for the congregation. Surrender was the message to ME. Surrender my pride. Surrender my privacy. Be honest, transparent, authentic by example. My cry to the Lord on Sunday was broken, full of weeping, desperate. It was me who needed to do the surrendering. This was not the "voice" I had envisioned. I expected to issue strong challenges to grow, to draw closer to the Lord, to direct hearts closer to the heart of God. One thing is clear: my direction is consistent with the way God operates. I am exactly where He wants me to be. The outcomes belong to Him. I must fix my eyes on His unseen purposes and plans. I must press on.